Are Russian men really more mature, more chivalrous, and more manly than other nationalities?
Warning! All facts below are based on personal experience, we can't vouch for your own Russian other half — if you have one. But, the proof of the pudding is in the eating — so get eating!
“He’s always thinking about saving up, buying a house, building a dacha, which is ok. I had never met a man in his 30s who felt miserable because he couldn’t give his lady a beautiful apartment, or who seriously thought of settling down,” says Sydney Vicidomini from Italy, who has lived with her Russian boyfriend for two years, and has been in a relationship with him for three-and-a-half.
“Russians are ready to start an adult life at the age of 20 to 25, and Germans or Italians usually do it no earlier than 35. For me, starting this late is cowardly,” adds Malwina Hołownia from Poland. She’s been married to a Russian man for two years. “That’s why I like Russian men - they are eager to take responsibility for life and live it for real.”
“Russian men are not afraid of commitment or having a family. They see it as something natural. Both our cultures view family as the most important thing,” says Paula Neira Pardo from Colombia, who dated her Russian boyfriend for four years before getting hitched a month ago.
But it’s not all about acting older than your years, as Sydney Vicidomini points out: “On the other hand, life is not just about saving up and building a house. There are also nights out, holidays, and adventures to be had. I don't think life should be too comfortable. That’s where the Italian comes in - I make things a little more exciting!”
It must also be noted that sometimes Russian men are not very communicative or confident about discussing their feelings. “They are usually very protective, so talking about problems with their partner can be difficult,’ comments Paula Neira Pardo.
“They are not taught during childhood to talk about their feelings and emotions, and it's sometimes a problem when they grow up. ‘Boys don't cry’ is the most stupid sentence that I’ve ever heard, but for Russian boys it's repeated all the time,” says Cecile Rouge from France, who married a Russian 16 years ago. “Russian society in general is more about gender roles, and the mindset is a bit more classical than in France. Men earn money, they are reliable, and women should feel like they have a ‘stone wall’ behind them.”
“He’s romantic when least expected - freshly picked flowers on my pillow when I wake up, or candles lit and a scented bath prepared for me,” shares Belinda Gibson from South Africa - the proud wife of a Russian man for more than two years. “He’s not one for cliches, or the perfectly timed bunch of flowers as the sun sets. He has his own raw, authentic style which knocks me off my feet.”
“I call my man ‘the knight with no fear nor fault,’ because he confessed his love for me on our third date,” adds Sydney Vicidomini from Italy.
Malwina Hołownia from Poland says this: “He treats me like a princess with all the gentleman stuff, buying flowers, carrying bags, and getting the bill in restaurants.”
Yet who knows gallantry better than a Frenchwoman? Cecile Rouge explains: “Russian men in general tend to be manly but also galant - carrying bags, giving flowers etc.”
“In general, I think he is chivalrous and romantic, I didn't see these traits with the New Zealander, Turkish, or English guys I’ve dated. He always acts the gentleman, he opens doors, carries my bags, asks me if I'm hungry or thirsty, always cares for me,” shares Sophie Hazlehurst from New Zealand, who has been married to a Russian for three months after going out for a year.
Annie Profatilova from the U.S. adds, “I love that my husband is chivalrous. While he may hold doors for me, and always offer to carry the groceries, he does not expect a hot meal on the table, or a clean house the way some Russian men do.”
However, there are some big drawbacks to going out with a Russian male: “I am never ever allowed to talk about poo in any way, ever!” exclaims Elizabeth Black from the UK - she’s been in a relationship with a Russian for almost 12 months.
Belinda Gibson summarizes it perfectly well: “I know, without him having to tell me, that he’d kill a bull for me. He’s ‘real’ - if that makes any sense?” We suppose it does.
Bree Winchester, from the U.S., who has been wedded to a Russian for two years has her say: “Even if he's being a jerk to everyone else, he's always kind to me and puts me first.”
“He cares about my plans and about my opinion,” comments Malwina Hołownia.
“I can say he is a responsible man and he makes sure we come first, my daughter and I,” states Sylphina Angel Gimony Semenova from the Philippines. She will soon celebrate two years of marriage with her Russian man.
American Nadine Aguilar, who has been hitched to her Russian sweetie pie for five years adds: “What I like most about him is that he supports me in most of my plans, ideas, decisions, and adventures no matter how crazy or strange they seem.”
However, Sophie Hazlehurst from New Zealand points out that jealousy can be an issue: “Sometimes he's worried I'm talking to other men or texting other men or something, and my Russian friends at work say their husbands are the same, so maybe this is cultural.”
Nadine Aguilar has a philosophical way of thinking about that: “Like most Russians, he sometimes communicates in a very frank or honest way which is normal and acceptable for Russians. For a non-Russian it can sometimes be unexpected, especially when translated into English or when spoken in English with non-Russians. Russians are not as good at hiding their true feelings or emotions as Americans are, but this can be seen also as a positive trait as this shows that Russians are less fake. We Americans like to be politically correct and we think carefully about what we want to say so that we do not anger or offend others.”
“I ended up loving a Russian the same way I ended up loving Russia - it was all completely unexpected,” confesses Sydney Vicidomini from Italy.
Belinda Gibson agrees: “I am constantly delighted and fascinated by the language and cultural differences - and similarities - which make us laugh and keep us engaged in conversation for hours.‘
Annie Profatilova feels honored to experience Russian culture in such an intimate way.
As for the cons, it seems the Soviet hangover still lingers. “I don't know why, but all Russians, especially men, have a feeling that they are somehow worse individuals than Germans or Americans. I don’t think they should have any complexes about it,” explains Malwina Hołownia from Poland.
“He studies Italian so he can talk to me and my family and eventually, who knows, to work with or live in Italy. He takes his learning very seriously, he feels committed to what he does, it becomes a matter of honor! And that's when the traumatized Soviet schoolboy switches on - I can't understand why he’s not able to buy a simple bus ticket without apologizing for his grammar when in Italy,’ shares Sydney Vicidomini.
Apparently, Russian men know how to enjoy life to the full.
“He's also very adventurous! No one makes me laugh like he does,” explains Elizabeth Black from the UK. Belinda Gibson agrees: “Although he’s cautious about the serious stuff, he is incredibly spontaneous when it comes to ‘live and let live.’
Annie Profatilova: “My husband is a talented painter, with an eye for fine art and an ear for classical music. I am sure that his growing up in Moscow contributed somewhat to his appreciation of culture. Being a millennial American myself, I am sure that it would be nearly impossible to find someone from my own background who possesses this trait.’
However, it’s not all rosy. Sylphina Angel Gimony Semenova admits: “I can say his weakness is beer and vodka. I think Russian men love to drink because all of his friends are the same. For me, everything is perfect except his drinking. But I am glad that step by step he is controlling and minimizing it.”
We agree with Belinda Gibson who describes Russian man’s personality this way: ‘His extremes are like Russia itself; and there is no in-between.’
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